Tuesday, August 21, 2012

If she didn't have diabetes...

it would be easy to respond to the party invitation we received this past week inviting Alex to a sleepover. In fact, I would embrace it and be grateful for a "break" from the constant "I'm bored" yawns that usually follow on the weekend when we aren't out and about.

But...this is different. I didn't say anything about the invitation at first to Alex. In fact the mom was nice enough to point out that the girls were welcome to stay for the swimming and cake and then go home if they wanted to (I'm thinking that was for our benefit). But...can you imagine me telling Alex to go home while all the other girls stay in their PJ's and slumber bags? That's going to go over well.

Anyway, I said nothing. And then Alex came home from school and mentioned that her friend told her about the party and sleepover. And then she declared she was going. I told her we needed to discuss it with her dad.

The thing is...it isn't fair to say no. She is going to be 10 years old in less than 2 weeks. She is on the insulin pump and has been super responsible. How can I tell her she can do anything with diabetes .... oh but sleepovers are out! 

So I mulled it over and finally realized I needed to make a decision. I called the mom this morning and discussed it with her and let her know that if anything I asked of her or said concerned her to the point of not having Alex over, I'd rather she tell me than try not to hurt my feelings. Then I explained there were 4 basic things I would ask of her in order to have Alex spend the night:
  1. Carb Counting: Help Alex count the carbs in all the food she eats. I suggested if she provide a list of foods, I could print a list of carbs for Alex and her to have. Alex could call me at anytime as well to ask for advice on carbs.
  2. Low Blood Sugar Protocol: I explained the rule of 15 and how to handle blood sugars below 80.  I also explained that they were to call me with any readings below 80.
  3. Middle of the Night Check: This was the biggest thing to ask of her - to get up about 3 hours after the girls go to sleep and wake Alex and have her test herself. If she is below 150 to give her a snack I will provide. I also plan to set temp basal settings on her pump so she runs a tad higher for the sleepover.
  4. Glucagon: I will bring her glucagon and explain how and when it would be used (while assuring her to date it is not something we have ever had to use so it isn't something she should expect to use but always should know what and how to use it in an emergency)
If she was okay with those 4 items, I was okay with the sleepover. Alex would carry a cell phone and text/call with her numbers when testing. If she had several lows, all bets are off and she would come home.

The mom was super nice and said she was on board with having Alex over for the night. I told her to think about it and talk to her husband first and call me back tomorrow. I don't know that I would be okay with it, you know? But I might be unsure what to say if I was her and need some time to think it through so I wanted her to have that time. It is a lot to ask of someone with no background in diabetes.

So we'll see what happens...I'm scared to death. I won't sleep Saturday night. I'm sure of that. But what else can I do? It's one night...it's only a few miles away...we can be in communication easily with the cell phones...I can set temp basals on her pump to run her higher...it's better to let her live her life than to keep her from being a normal 10 year old tween girl who just wants to experience what everyone else gets to experience, right?

3 comments:

  1. Good for you for considering it. I haven't considered it yet, and thankfully Kortnie hasn't really been invited to any sleepovers....yet, well besides Grandma's house and that makes me nervous enough. I hope the mom says she will be willing to help, and that Alex gets to go and that all will be well. Maybe you can tell her that she has to be reponsible about her diabetes and that she needs to follow the rules and do her checks and bolus and that if she does you will continue letting her do things without you, tell her that it's okay if her numbers are a little high and/or low, but she needs to remember to do the checks and respond to you when you call her with questions about her numbers. Or you could pitch a tent in the backyard of this friends' house so you can be there and know what's going on. LOL...good luck!

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  2. The mom is super nice and they have graciously said yes to everything and seemed very attentive to understanding what is needed. So I guess she is going! They told me they will text me with her numbers each time she tests. I'm scared but we're moving forward.

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  3. OH, OH, OH!!!!!!! Seriously. I totally understand this post!!!! Sugar has been dx for 7 years, and -- up until a couple weeks ago -- I went on every sleepover WITH her!!! Seriously!!! How cool is it to have YOUR MOM crashing the party :( So, when the invite came for this last one, I had to work that night -- and, let's face it, you don't send DAD to spend the night with a room full of 8 and 9 year olds!!!! So....

    http://www.candyheartsblog.com/2012/08/solo-sleepover-rest-of-story.html

    Let's hope Alex isn't quite as sassy....

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